Suzy Sharp is a popular woman. On a Sunday afternoon at her home near Riverside and 71st Street in Tulsa, she’s juggling several visitors and an unexpected phone call.
“I can’t talk right now,” Sharp says, clicking off the phone after just a moment.
Sharp is an early member of Tulsa’s only cohousing community. Cohousing is a Danish style of living that encourages relationships.
“What attracted me to it is the idea that I would know the people around me. I could walk out my front door and see somebody I wanted to have a cup of coffee or a glass of wine with and a good conversation,” said Sharp.
Sharp said she first heard about the cohousing idea on public radio and got involved in a series of meetings that saw interest spread. Tulsa’s community, now nearly full, was about seven years in the making. It sits on almost five acres close to the Arkansas River. 36 units are mostly for people 55 and older.
There are 341 existing or planned cohousing communities in the United States of various styles. Some are built around families with children. But all cohousing communities share common characteristics.
“We discuss, we talk, we propose, we listen,” said Sharp.
Cohousing is designed to maintain privacy while boosting engagement. Privately owned houses are clustered in a way to encourage chatting and walking. Residents have their own kitchens but often eat together. Everyone is expected to pitch in for a certain number of hours a month. In short, the cohousing dream is to be “surrounded by caring, collaborative neighbors who use less of the earth’s resources while living an abundant life.”
Karen Byerly moved from a cabin near the Illinois River in rural Oklahoma.
“My husband died 18 years ago, so I lived out there with 18 acres by myself all that time, and I got too old and too lonely,” said Byerly.
She was already planning to move when she got into a car accident. She tears up when she talks about how her new neighbors pitched in to help her while her pelvis was fractured. She tears up again when she remembers how the community banded together to celebrate her birthday.
"My family had a surprise party for my 80th birthday here in our common house, and everybody here was in on it, and nobody let on. I was completely surprised," said Byerly.
Boosters say cohousing is a great solution for people who want daily connection, especially at a time when Americans are spending more time alone than ever before. But cohousing is not exactly affordable. The cheapest, smallest unit in Tulsa is more than $350,000.
Resident Sarah-Anne Schumann says there could be a place for cohousing in the city’s push for affordable housing.
“There are some communities that have subsidies so that they have affordable housing, and thinking about Tulsa, and thinking about how we’re planning so many different ways to increase our housing supply, it would be amazing if cohousing was a part of that,” said Schumann.
Schumann pointed to Boulder, Colorado, where the housing authority completed four cohousing projects boasting up to 60% “permanently affordable deed restricted housing units.”
“We would love to see more of these. We would love some government assistance and creative developers to think about how it could be more affordable and accessible to more people because it is an absolute joy.”
Officials estimate Tulsa needs to add about 13,000 homes of all types within a decade to meet demand.
